


My Tears Are Becoming An Ocean

by HoydenCaulfield



Category: Free!
Genre: M/M, Sort of the little mermaid but not really, angst and bad jokes, merman au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-02
Updated: 2014-02-02
Packaged: 2018-01-10 21:23:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,977
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1164680
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HoydenCaulfield/pseuds/HoydenCaulfield
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Long, long ago in a land far away there lived two boys,  one was the land dwelling son of a lowly cook and the other was the scion of a noble merhouse. [Merman AU]</p>
            </blockquote>





	My Tears Are Becoming An Ocean

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Oyasumi](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Oyasumi/gifts).



> Oyasumi I hope this is ok! I tried out a different style here, I'm not the person to judge if it was successful but I hope you enjoy it either way c: 
> 
> (I’m actually working on something based on your angel prompt as well but it turned into a monster so I thought I’d better do something I could actually finish in time, but keep your eyes peeled for that at some point...)

Long, long ago in a land far away there lived two boys, one was the land dwelling son of a lowly cook and the other was the scion of a noble merhouse.

The first boy, Haru, was a quiet, serious young man who spent his days running errands and helping his mother grill fish in the kitchen of the local manor house. He never complained, although the other boys his age in the village mainly spent their days playing or learning to fight from the local retired knight. The boy’s one normal pastime was swimming, for Haru and his mother (his father was long dead) lived in a small cottage very close to the beach. Haru’s mother encouraged this pastime, for if money hadn’t been so tight she would have dearly loved to let him to do as he pleased all the time. She even introduced him to another boy who loved to swim, Makoto the son of the fisherman who supplied most of the manor’s fish. So when they could spare him in the kitchen, Haru spent his time exploring the local coastline with Makoto and thus his days passed in peaceful routine, until Haru had a fateful encounter in the sea.

The second boy’s name was Rin, and he was the spoiled young master of a venerable merpeople dynasty in the ocean that bordered Haru’s homeland. He was the opposite of Haru in many ways; where Haru was precociously self-contained, Rin was outgoing and craved the attention and good-regard of everyone he met, but they shared one important thing in common: they were both lonely children who secretly craved adventure.

On the day the two were fated to meet, Makoto was busy helping his father and older siblings on the family fishing boat, so Haru was swimming alone for the first time in a while. There was a rock formation he had always wanted to explore, but Makoto would never let him swim out there saying it was way too dangerous. Haru was confident in his own ability to make it out there though, he was, after all, the strongest swimmer he knew, so that day he took the fateful decision to try and swim out to the rocks.

Two thirds of the way out there he was starting to worry that Makoto had been right after all; the rocks didn’t seem to be getting any closer, but it was too far to turn back now. There were a few dicey moments but although his legs felt like jelly and his arms could barely support his weight, he finally managed to lever himself up onto the flattest of the rocks, where he lay for a long time while he caught his breath and let life return to his limbs. His reverie was interrupted when he shifted onto his side and a voice piped up from the sea beside him.

“Oh, I thought you might be dead,” it said in a tone of highly alarming disappointment. Haru cracked one eye open to reveal a boy seemingly about his own age , with long scarlet hair and a grin that split his face to reveal suspiciously sharp teeth.

“Well, I’m not” he replied peevishly, which caused the other boy to look momentarily thoughtful.

“Hmm, I suppose that’s probably good, I’m pretty sure I’d be required to eat you if you were and you look kind of stringy.” Seeing the look on Haru’s face and interpreting it as offence he quickly backtracked on the entirely wrong bit of his statement. “Not that your body isn’t good for swimming and stuff but I don’t think it’d be very tasty, that’s all.”

Haru was still trying to figure out how to deal with this weird potential cannibal, when he grinned again and pulled himself up to sit next to Haru on the rock, revealing that he was in fact even weirder than his introduction had lead Haru to believe.

“Y-y-you have a _tail_.” Haru gasped, causing the other boy to look positively gleeful and wiggle it about a bit.

“Isn’t it lovely? The Queen says it’s the prettiest one she’s seen in a long while.” Despite the off-putting smugness, Haru had to admit it was truly lovely. The scales were a mix of iridescent blues and greys, although scattered here and there were scales of a blazing scarlet that Haru had never seen on a fish before, and the beautiful lacy fins were of a similar shade.

“I’m Rin by the way, what’s your name?” Rin had seemingly had enough of Haru staring at him and extended his hand to shake. Though Haru was still reeling from the revelation that mermaids were real, he managed to rouse himself enough to mumble his own name in response and offer a limp handshake of his own.

“OK Haru let’s be friends! I’ve never had a human friend before, I’m not really supposed to talk to you at all, but I promised myself if someone swam out to this rock I’d make them my friend and here you are! It’s definitely fate!” Haru was stunned into silence yet again by this unexpected enthusiasm leaving Rin an opening to lean into him conspiratorially. “I’m really glad you’re not old, or even worse a _girl_ , my little sister and her friends are always following me around and it’s so annoying.”

Haru found himself strangely flustered when the other b-… _The merboy_ put his face so close to his own, so when Rin was done complaining about his sister he found himself somehow agreeing to be his friend and to meet him back at the rock the next day. Once he’d got what he wanted Rin slapped him on the back once before diving back into the sea, disappearing all too quickly into the cobalt deeps. Haru pinched himself once, hard, to make sure he wasn’t dreaming, before slumping back onto the rock wondering what on earth he’d gotten himself into.

~

The next day found Haru reluctantly swimming out to the rocks. Makoto was still busy helping his family so he was alone again, half convinced he’d made the whole thing up and he’d have a long lonely day ahead of him. He was more prepared for the swim this time so he wasn’t quite so winded when he got there and sat up after a much shorter rest period.

Rin had obviously been waiting for him as he appeared almost as soon as Haru recovered; he tried to play it off like he hadn’t been but he was blushing the whole time, it was endearing and at that moment Haru decided maybe they could be friends after all. They spent a fun few hours splashing about in the sea; Rin was impressed with Haru’s ability to keep up with him which left him feeling prouder than he’d ever admit. After Haru tired they sat on the rock and compared life on land with life under the oceans, it was fascinating seeing the differences and the similarities and for once Haru let himself be drawn out and talk about himself. That day Haru was agreeing to come back the next day before Rin was even done asking.

~

They met almost every day for the next few weeks, Rin always waiting patiently (though he’d claim it was fine because he’d been busy with some unspecified activity whenever Haru apologised) when the kitchen kept him late. Though Makoto was finally able to swim with him again, Haru kept it from him, liking the feeling of having a secret, liking the feeling that Rin was somehow _his_ even more.

When Rin found out about it he sulked for days, unable to decide whether he was more offended that Haru wouldn’t be able to spend as much time with him, that he was seemingly too ashamed to tell his friend about him or just the fact Haru had another friend at all. He was a determined and stubborn sulker so Haru was finally forced to admit he just wanted to keep him to himself, though he had to admit the uncharacteristically shy smile Rin graced him with was worth the bone deep embarrassment.

~

Their lives continued on in this fashion for over a year, snatching whatever time they could to be together on what they’d both begun to think of as their rock. When one day Rin grumbled for the millionth time about how hard it was becoming to sneak out without his sister catching him, Haru casually suggested he bring her. He’d mainly been trying to forestall a rant he’d heard on numerous occasions, so he was pretty surprised when a few days later he turned up to find a pretty mermaid bobbing excitedly next to Rin.

“Wow your legs are so cool! Maybe I should get the sea witch to turn me into a human like that girl in the legends.” She cooed excitedly, poking him in the calves; Haru was pretty intrigued by the idea of an honest to goodness sea witch but Rin was shushing her before he could get any details.

It was pretty fun playing with other people after all; Rin’s attention was still mainly focused on him but it gave them a wider choice of games, and after they departed for the afternoon, Gou practically leaping out the sea in her excitement to wave to him, Haru decided it was time to finally introduce Makoto to Rin.

Unfortunately that was the night Haru found out he was being sent away. His mother had lost her job at the manor through no fault of her own, but the family was moving to the city full time and was only keeping a skeleton staff on. There was little other work for a widow in the village and they’d struggle to eat, but the head cook, who was accompanying the family to their house in the city had offered to take Haru in as an apprentice. Haru knew they didn’t really have any other option, so while his mother cried at having to send him away when he finally seemed happy, Haru was stoic. As important as Rin was to him he didn’t want to be a burden on his mother, who’d brought him up all alone, and this way he’d be able to send money home once he was an adult. Maybe he’d be able to come back one day. So he wiped his mother’s tears and said it was fine, he’d go and he’d become a man she could be proud of.

He had two days to say goodbye, that wasn't nearly enough time.

Telling Makoto was easy, he was a good son and understood loyalty to family like no one else. Rin though... Rin was a lot harder, he'd never had to deal with any real hardship before and so the thought of Haru leaving him was the worst thing he could imagine. He screamed and he cried and he told Haru he hated him, which hurt, but there nothing either of them could do, he had to go.

On the last afternoon he plucked up all his courage and kissed Rin right on the lips, but his courage failed him right after and he swam off before Rin could even react.

And then it was over and he was gone. 

~

Ten whole years passed in no time at all, and although Haru still wondered how Rin was faring from time to time, his work in the palace kitchens kept him busy enough that he rarely had a spare moment to dwell on his strange first love. The fact that he could never talk about it made it seem less and less real and he was almost resigned to the boring life he’d built for himself in the city.

His routine was shattered once again by the news his mother had passed away: he hadn't even known she was sick but that was her way, she’d never want to worry him. As soon as he got the news he left his job and rode hard to see to the funeral arrangements in the village.

He hadn't been back in ten whole years and it seemed like something from another life to walk round his old cottage, had it always been so small? Had it always been so empty?

Staying inside depressed him, there were too many memories so he went down to the seashore, but he couldn't bring himself to swim. There was no way Rin would still be waiting for him after all, it was better not to even try.

Once the financial matters were dealt with Haru paid Makoto a visit, though he hadn't seen him in ten years they had been keeping in contact via the occasional letter and he knew things hadn't been going well for his old friend, but he wasn't prepared for quite how empty the once bustling house would be.

One sister was all that Makoto had left out of a once large and close knit family and there was a palpable gloom hanging over the both of them.

“If only dad had never caught that merman things wouldn't have turned out like this” Makoto's sister lamented at one point and Haru's ears pricked up at once.

“What exactly happened?” He asked, trying not to sound too eager. He could see the two siblings sizing him up before exchanging a portentous look; he tried to give off an air of innocent concern which evidently worked because they relented and told him the whole story.

One night a few years after Haru left Makoto's father was out fishing alone. He'd gone further than he usually did, to a spot his older brother had recommended to the family not long prior, but though his brother had made him swear only to fish by rod never net he'd disregarded the warning and cast his net instead.

After he'd been there a few hours he went to pull his net in and found it strangely heavy; hoping for a monster catch he huffed and he puffed until he'd pulled it into the boat and found, much to his surprise, that he'd caught a merman not a fish at all. At first he just stared, it was crazy after all, who ever expected to catch a half man half fish? And it seemed to be dead, that was ideal, even though it was an old one he'd make a ton of money if he got it stuffed and displayed it.

He was cheerfully untangling it from the sack, thinking about the toys he'd buy his children when the money started rolling in, planning the new, bigger house they'd move into, when all his ambitions were crushed by the merman beginning to thrash about. He went cold all over, his plans had been so vivid they'd started to seem real and he wasn't ready to let them go just yet. He cast his eyes over the contents of the small boat in desperation until they alighted on the fish gutting knife in the corner.

Shamefacedly recounting this story to his family later he claimed to be unable to remember what happened next but they'd grown up with that knife and they could all too vividly imagine what it would have done to the defenceless flesh of the merman.

Once the frenzy was over there hadn't been enough of the merman left to stuff. Though he'd disposed of the body as far from where he'd found it as he could, he couldn't get out of the ocean fast enough, what if someone saw him? What if one of _them_ saw him?

After that nothing went right for the fisherman's family. The youngest was the first to suffer, succumbing to a fever that came out of nowhere as soon as the fisherman returned home. After another of his children died in mysterious circumstances the fisherman felt compelled to confess what he'd done, but it seemed confession alone was not enough and one by one Makoto's family died until he and his sister were all that was left.

“That merman cursed us.” Makoto told him solemnly. “What my father did was terrible... But I don't know what my whole family did to deserve this, my little brother was only 5, when will his ghost be satisfied?”

Haru regarded the faces in front of him, prematurely aged by suffering, and experienced the overwhelming urge to fix it.

“I might be able to help” he told them finally, carefully avoiding the full beam of their hopeful gazes. “I knew a merman when I was a child, if we go back to where your father met that other merman and I can find him he might tell us what we need to do.”

It was a testament to how desperate they were that neither of them even questioned how or when or why, instead they just bustled about preparing for a journey.

  
~

They weren't the ideal conditions to be going out on the sea but neither of the two young men were in the frame of mind to be safety conscious, so they piled into Makoto's dad's old boat, let his sister load them up with provisions and then charted a course to the spot where Makoto's father had his fateful encounter with a merman.

The winds were in their favour and it didn't take them long to reach the spot Makoto had heard described so many times, but once they had arrived they were both at a loss as to what to do. Haru had never had to summon Rin when they were children, he'd just always _been_ there but he didn't want to let Makoto down, not when he'd been through so much.

In the end Makoto put down anchor and they just sort of drifted about the one spot. Makoto staring off into the horizon, Haru staring down into the depths, both of them were so engrossed in their self-imposed tasks that by the time they realised a storm was creeping up on them it was already too late. As the wind picked up and the rain poured down, the two men exchanged horrified looks for a brief moment and then the storm was upon them in earnest.

They both held onto the sides of the boat as hard as they could, recognising that their only hope was if it didn't capsize and at first it seemed like that might work, but then there was one almighty crack of thunder and in a terrible instant Makoto lost his grip and went over the edge. Haru hesitated for a second, but only a second before diving in after him. He found him surprisingly easily but unfortunately Makoto was seriously panicking and Haru found it almost impossible to get enough of a grip on him to try and help him back into the boat. Makoto eventually seemed to realise it was Haru that had him, not a merman or the curse, and let himself be pushed back into the little boat that was amazingly still afloat.

Once he was in the boat he lent down to try and help Haru in, but they were both exhausted and it just wasn't working. Haru just had enough time to regret ever going to the palace and leaving the only people he cared about behind before the cold, wet darkness engulfed him. 

~

When Haru woke up he had no idea where he was and he tried to take a deep breath in preparation for dealing with whatever situation he found himself in, but something was very wrong, it didn't seem like he was breathing at all. Maybe he was really dead, but the afterlife seemed pretty watery which seemed kind of a cruel twist considering he'd presumably drowned. He took a tentative look around, no, there was definitely nothing but water around here. He was busy pondering whether he was in some kind of ironic hell and what his crime might have been when a face popped into his watery view and distracted him.

/Ah, you're awake!/

Though he could hear the words loud and clear, the face in front of him wore an unchanging smile; confused, Haru looked about but there was nobody else in eyeshot. Was God talking to him??

Some of his confusion must have shown on his face because the mysterious face gained an arm and patted him on the shoulder.

/Oh, sorry, I forgot you're not used to this. We talk with our minds down here./ The face continued smiling but Haru was appalled, had someone been listening to him running through all his sins earlier? He tried to ask whether the face was God but it didn't seem to be working.

/Oh! Right! It's not automatic, you have to really mean it, it's a bit like the speaking you're used to./ The face, which Haru was now alert enough to recognise was of a cheeky make and surrounded by blonde curls. /I can't just read everything in your mind don't worry./

/W H E RE A M I?/ Haru thought with as much force as he could; evidently this was the mind equivalent of shouting because the other man winced.

/That was really great but slightly less force next time ok? To answer your question, you're in the East Merkingdom and I'm Nagisa, apprentice sea witch!/

Haru was momentarily pleased he was finally meeting a real sea witch before the rest of what Nagisa had said sunk in.

/So I'm not dead?/ He asked in what he hoped was a softer mind voice; he was slightly perturbed when Nagisa began to go through all the actions of laughing without the sound.

/No you're not. Rin brought you in, we're not used to treating your kind but he was most insistent, so we used a few general healing spells and a special one that lets you temporarily breathe like us while you're down here./

Haru opened his mouth on reflex before closing it again slowly. Nagisa obviously caught the gesture because he did the weird silent laugh again and gestured for Haru to lie down again (how was he not floating??)

/I'm sure you have a lot of questions but you're still recuperating and we need to monitor you for side effects, treating humans is very new to us so why don't you go back to sleep for now?/

Haru was just getting ready to protest but he really _was_  feeling sleepy and so he let the dark claim him again. 

~

The next time Haru woke up he was sure Rin was there, an older Rin but still, he'd know him anywhere, but just as he was trying to remember how to manage the mind talk he was gone again. 

~

The third time he awoke he felt a lot better, things seemed a lot clearer, if still overwhelmingly strange. This time there was yet another new face, this one had black hair and wore what appeared to be glasses, though what use glasses would be underwater Haru couldn't begin to fathom.

/Ah, you're awake!/ The face exclaimed. /I'm the sea-witch Rei and I will be your physician while you're staying with us./

/I thought you'd be a woman!/ Haru was mortified to discover it was still possible to blurt stuff out when thinking it. Rei pursed his lips in disapproval.

/We don't have any of your silly hang-ups about gender down here young human!/ was all he was able to work out before the sea-witch went off on a rant, mainly to himself. 

Haru must have made some kind of questioning noise because Rei turned back towards him and it looked like he was about to s-  _think_  something directly to him when there was an awful sound from the corner of the room.

/Nagisa! What have I told you, you have to measure the ingredients before you assemble a spell you can't just keep making it up!/ Sure enough, when Haru looked over to the source of the noise, Nagisa was sat there sheepishly by what appeared to be a bubble filled with brightly coloured gas. Once the crisis was contained Rei turned his attention back to Haru.

/You'll have to excuse my assistant, he doesn't yet have the analytical mind needed for an important role like this, he's always cutting corners./

Haru nodded in what he hoped passed for an understanding manner for mermen in the hopes of getting a chance to ask questions, but all he got was a dirty look from Nagisa and an explanation of how he was 'breathing' from Rei that honestly went right over his head. After what seemed like an eternity there was finally a gap long enough for Haru to ask if they knew if Makoto was OK. Rei made a truly awful face and for a moment Haru feared the worse, until Nagisa started laughing.

/Yes, my assistant here ferried your friend back to land and apparently took the opportunity to tell him all sorts of our secrets./ Nagisa looked entirely unrepentant and in his relief Haru grinned back at him. So Makoto was OK, that was a big relief, which just left one burning question.

/Where's Rin?/ He thought at them, trying hard not to let any of his inner turmoil colour the question. The two sea-witches exchanged looks before Nagisa finally answered.

/About that... There's someone else you need to talk to about that./

 ~

Haru waited impatiently for whoever was supposedly coming to see him. He'd managed to badger a few answers out of Rei and Nagisa, such as the fact he was currently in the room in their suite they used for treating patients, but they wouldn't tell him who it was they wanted him to talk to. He felt supremely antsy, he'd never appreciated being able to pace so much as when he no longer had the ability to do so, in fact leaving him to his own devices was liable to end up with him going crazy. This was still just too weird. 

He was just marvelling at the bizarre and unexpected fact merpeople still had doors, when the door actually opened. The first thing he saw was a shock of scarlet hair and he was just starting to get excited when he recognised the pretty face that followed it. 

/Gou!/ In his excitement at seeing a familiar face (even if it wasn't quite the one he'd been hoping for) he completely forgot himself, tried to walk forward and ended up doing an awkward somersault in mid-water. Gou just stared at him in disbelief.

/I see you haven't quite got the hang of it/ she commented wryly, and Haru was just returning her small smile when as soon as it had appeared it was gone. /Haru, I'm sorry but you need to go, you need to go as soon as possible./ 

He wasn't really sure how to reply to that seemingly out of nowhere remark. Gou seemed to realise her mistake at starting mid-conversation and soundlessly sighed, backtracking slightly.

/I know you've been a way a long time,/ she eyed him reproachfully as she said it, /my brother was a mess when you left, but that was a long time ago OK? If you met now you wouldn't be friends, do you know why? Do you know what you people did to our father??/

For a minute Haru really didn't know, but then his mind helpfully supplied all the graphic details of Makoto's story and he felt sick. Gou eyed him grimly, the expression seemed so out of place on a face built for cheerfulness, and Haru was wholeheartedly sorry he'd had any part in putting it there.

/I see you do know and if you know that you'll understand how it's in everyone's best interests you leave right now./ She turned to leave and in his mind's eye he could see how this would all play out: the sea-witches would come back and then Nagisa would escort him back to shore like he had Makoto and he'd never see any of them ever again. He couldn't let it end like that.

/Can't I see him? To say goodbye?/ This time he made sure to put all the pleading he felt into the thought. Gou turned back and made another solemn face at him.

/I don't think that's a good idea/ she stated firmly before swimming out the door, but Haru recognised a maybe when he heard one. 

 ~

The next time the door opened, Haru was honestly expecting either the return of Rei and Nagisa or, when he saw the tell tale scarlet again, that it was Gou coming to tell him that he really had outstayed his welcome and it was time to go back to land. But that wasn't it, that wasn't it at all.

/Rin.../ Haru wasn't sure if he'd thought it or  _thought_ it, but Rin turned to look at him so he must have got the hang of it. There was a terrible pause where no one said anything before Haru bit his lip and spoke up, metaphorically. 

/Rin, thank you for saving me, I know you don't have any reason to love humans anymore./ 

/Everyone’s saying I should’ve left you to drown and they’re right, I should’ve... I almost did./ Though his tone was strident at first he couldn’t hide the guilt in the last sentence, or the telling way he finally looked at Haru, and Haru longed to go to him.

/You would never do that./ He offered soothingly, but it only seemed to enrage Rin all over again.

/Wouldn’t I? If it had been any other human I would have./ He was closer now, close enough to touch. /If it had been your little _friend_ I would have and I wouldn’t be a laughing stock among the other nobles now./

He’d got even closer now, hissing the last words right into Haru’s face, and though later he’d be horrified as the implications for Makoto sunk in, right then all he could think about was how _close_ Rin was and how much he’d missed him. He began to reach for him but Rin seemed to sense the movement and backed up as if burned, before storming out as dramatically as anyone could while swimming, leaving Haru alone with blown pupils and one arm half extended.

~

He didn't see Rin again for days. He spent his time swimming around the bits of the palace that were available to him and politely but firmly shutting down any attempts Rei and Nagisa made to bring up returning him to his home. He wasn't ready to go just yet, not until Rin himself told him to leave, not after he'd finally met him again. 

He was busy staring out a window that gave him a beautiful view of a nearby coral reef when someone cleared their throat behind him; he'd finally gotten more used to being underwater and was very grateful for his newfound grace when he turned to find Rin behind him. He looked a lot less angry and a lot more sad this time and Haru wasn't sure if that was a good sign or not, he was steeling himself to start a conversation when Rin beat him to the punch, looking sick but determined. 

/Haru... You have to go/ 

/But I don't want to/ he replied matter of factly, and, firming his resolve /I missed you./

Rin looked like Haru's words physically pained him.

/I missed you too, of course I did but... Nothing good will come of this we're from two different worlds, my people will never accept me consorting with a human, certainly not anymore./ 

Haru didn't really know how to argue with that so reacting on instinct he just kissed him, partially to shut him up but mainly because he'd wanted to ever since the last time he'd done it. He'd thought that kissing underwater would be awkward but it wasn't really, it felt right, or maybe it was just that kissing Rin felt right. They both kissed like they'd never be able to stop, like this would be the last thing they ever did, that this would be forever. Yet somehow all too soon Rin was pulling away, he looked totally stricken and before he turned away Haru caught a glimpse of what it would look like to cry without any tears. It was heartbreaking.

/I'm sorry but we really can't do this, tell Rei to send you home./

And he was gone.

'I guess it was his turn to leave me after all' was all Haru could think on his way back to Rei's rooms.

~

Once he was back on dry land it seemed like all the emotions from the whole horrible few weeks hit him at once and he shut himself away to mourn. In almost one fell swoop he'd lost both his mother and his only love, that would be a blow to anyone, but to someone who made so few but such strong attachments it was almost insurmountable. When word got around he'd survived and made it back all his mother's neighbours came to visit but he ignored the door until they went away. Even when Makoto came he couldn't bring himself to get up, even when his oldest friend shouted through the door that though he was so happy that Haru was ok, he couldn't stay here and be a fisherman any more, that Nagisa had told him there was no curse so his sister was going to become a seamstress and he was leaving for the city to become a knight. He didn't even get up when Makoto came to tell him he was leaving.

Eventually he began to feel a little bette;, though he wasn't ready to go out just yet he retrived the food the villagers had left outside his door and the letter Makoto had left telling him how to contact him. As he sat eating berry preserves out of the jar he realised that it was time he went back to the city too. He just had one thing left to do to make peace with his situation. 

A few more days passed, which Haru spent rebuilding his strength and calling on the people in the village to tell them he was leaving for good this time, and then once that was done he swam back out to their rock.

The swim there seemed both longer and so much shorter than it had when he was a child, and the rock certainly seemed a lot smaller, it was barely enough to contain his torso let alone all his limbs. He'd thought he'd be able to cope with being back here but in reality the wound was still raw and before he knew it he was weeping like a child, like he hadn't since he'd first heard the news about his mother, since he hadn't since he left. 

He cried and cried and cried until he felt like there was nothing left to give; at least he knew this rock was used to holding him up when he couldn’t hold his weight up himself. Suddenly there was a polite throat clearing noise from his left. At first Haru thought he was imagining things, some alternative version of that fateful meeting so long ago, but no, there it was again, even louder this time. Haru sat up and stared in shock as Nagisa gave another impatient little cough.

"What are you doing here?" He asked incredulously. 

"How would you like to become a merman?" Nagisa replied with a serious look Haru had never seen on him before.

"...What?"

"Look, really I'm supposed to offer you some kind of horrible trade that will ruin your life or at least really inconvenience you, but I can't bear watching that sad-sack Rin floating round the palace and you seem like a nice enough guy, so how about I take those tears you just cried and make you a merman and you two can be together?" The whole thing was delivered a bit like a carnival pitch and Haru found himself yet again slightly speechless.

"This is a verrrrry exclusive offer you know, and a very limited one, so you'd better decide quick." 

Haru thought about it: all his ties were gone now and even more than that, wouldn't he always regret it if he didn't even try?

"OK," he said decisively, "let's do it."

~

It took him a while to get used to the tail; at first his swimming was embarrassingly clumsy and he had to put up with Rei following him around shaking his head and proclaiming it 'not beautiful' (it was deeply annoying but honestly it was better than the silent treatment he'd been giving both Haru and Nagisa for not following the proper trade procedure.) Alhough it wasn’t really Haru’s style, Rei and Nagisa were both insistent he make a dramatic entrance when he finally met Rin, so he was stuck in their rooms while they put him through merman boot camp. Luckily it seemed a slow season for merpeople injuries so he only had to hide a few times, even if it was still a few times too many.

Finally the day came when he’d regained much of his original grace, and he nervously swam up and down a corridor waiting for the sea-witches’ verdict. Finally Rei pronounced his form beautiful and that he was free to go. Unfortunately Nagisa insisted on giving him a graphic description of how mermen had sex, but luckily a scandalised Rei intervened when he offered to give him a hands-on tutorial. Haru was 90% sure he’d been joking but it certainly made him even more eager to finally escape their rooms.

After extracting himself with a half-hearted promise to tell them _all_ the details later he swam the short distance to where Rin’s apartments began and steeled himself for whatever the reaction was going to be.

The door to Rin’s room creaked ominously when he opened it and he tried not to take it as a sign; when had he become so superstitious? Maybe it was a merman trait. He could see the muscles of that beloved back over by the window; although he wasn’t trying to be silent Rin didn’t look up at all upon his entrance, just continued staring out at the coral reef beyond. Haru wasn’t sure how Rin would react if he touched him so he just called his name as quietly as he could.

Rin whirled with such force Haru almost took a step back before remembering he couldn’t do that anymore. A barrage of emotions seemed to cross Rin’s scarily gaunt face in the moment before he was propelling himself across the room. Haru braced himself, unsure if Rin was about to hit him or kiss him, but he did neither and instead grabbed him so tightly it would have crushed the air out of him if he still had any left. Rin was doing that scary tearless merman crying again, big ugly sobs that he seemed unable to control, so Haru just stroked his hair until he calmed down enough to talk.

~

Eventually Rin was calm enough to allow them to separate.

/I didn't think I'd ever see you again!/ Rin said, seemingly awestruck by this unexpected turn of events, but then he seemed to come to a sudden horrifying realisation. /I.. Just.. What did you do? What did he take??/

/Oh, I see. No, it wasn't Rei, it was Nagisa, he didn't take anything, he just wanted us to be happy./ They were still stood very close together, and Haru marvelled at the fact he was still affected by proximity after everything that had happened. 

/I'm sorry about how everything ended, I never wanted it to turn out like that but... I couldn't let everybody down by abandoning them for a human, even um... even one like you./ It seemed like Rin wasn't any less susceptible to the shyness that had snuck up on them suddenly, because he couldn’t quite look at Haru as he said it, but Haru had had enough of that and stared at him until they made eye contact.

/I know, I understand and that's why I'm here, you're all that matters to me. I love you, I love you more than anything./ Haru could see Rin was taken aback by this uncharacteristic fierceness but now wasn't the time to be reserved, this was the most important thing he'd ever done. /I know my people killed your father and that I have no idea about your traditions or your culture, but you're all I've ever thought about since I was 12 years old... I've given up my legs and my life on the land... Not that I'm pressuring you... But all I want is to be with you, so... well... Would you let me stay with you? Even if we can't be together I just want to be by your side.../

Haru had used up all his new found social bravery with that one short speech and couldn't bring himself not to close his eyes. He didn't even know what he was hoping for, it all seemed too much. People like him didn't find and keep true love it was ridiculous, but even with his eyes closed he couldn't ignore the feeling of soft lips on his, or those same lips mouthing the word _yes_ and o _f course we can be together_ against his. 

~

After Haru's emotional confession, many things happened that Haru sensibly cut out of the report he gave to Nagisa, but the most important was that Rin accepted.

And after much drinking and carousing and a massive wedding accompied by copious tears (from Rin, but also from Gou and Rei, though he'd never admit it) they lived happily ever after.

 

 

 


End file.
